Just a Day...

It's almost eleven o'clock on this first Monday of May, and I'm just at a loss. I should be up and moving around, typing away on my computer finishing up assignments that are long overdue, but I just can't. I'm finding myself feeling rested, but still needing to sleep! The lights are out, my window unit is running which makes it extremely cozy under my sheets, and I just don't want to do a single thing. Well, I guess I am "blogging" - and that requires just a little effort.

I haven't done well at keeping my blog readers updated in recent months. The theme of most of my entries has been on lack of time and motivation, and yes, that still continues, but I do see the end coming soon.

This past month has brought about many changes in my life as well as some of my friend's. I am excited to report that my dear friend Lizabeth is moving to Peru for a year to volunteer, and I am so happy for her! I'm finding myself a bit envious of her up and coming journey, but I know God will truly bless her on this next adventure. Hopefully I will get down there next summer to visit! Many friends had birthdays, some I remembered, and some I forgot. :) I'm just not myself lately, so if you're reading this, and I missed your birthday, I am SOOOOO sorry! Hopefully soon I can resort back to the good ol' snail mail that I used to love to write! Unfortunately I'm never in my car, so I don't call people anymore, and when I am on my computer it's for school work and the last thing I want to do is write a real email to someone! Excuses, excuses, I know, but it's true. It's not that I don't love you - I just can't seem to 'get it together' anymore. What's happening to me?!

Our Supper Club has been growing, and we've even opened it up to young married couples! I called up a new guy tonight and hope he will make it to dinner tomorrow. My sister in law and nephew Matthew came for a visit two weeks ago, and I still can't get over how fast he is growing. I do wish I lived closer to them - I feel like I'm missing out on being the "aunt" I've always wanted to be. I don't know what I'd do without my aunts.

I had the biggest compliment this past weekend - from my uncle. My whole life I've always wanted someone to tell me I look like one of my parents. You know how you can always tell which one the child looks like or favors, but in my childhood, and adulthood now, no one has ever compared me to any of them! I've always been told I look like my aunt, and that is a wonderful thing, but it's just that I often thought that maybe I was adopted or something! Well, that soon changed - this weekend, my uncle told me that now that I've lost some weight, I look just like my mom! What a compliment! I think my mom is beautiful! I had a huge smile on my face the rest of the evening - thank you Uncle Robin for sharing that with me.

On to the Women's Ministry at my church. I was asked to be a part of the ministry team recently, just as plans were being made for our Spring retreat. I didn't realize all that I had offered to help with until the night before the event, but I have to say we had a splendid weekend. Almost sixty women came to both sessions, and what a blessing it was. Our them was "authenic beauty" and one of my tasks was to interview men and ask them one simple question - "What makes a woman beautiful to you?" I shared with the ladies just a small bit of background info. on who I talked with and then what they had to say. The similarities and differences were quite interesting, and funny at times, especially when you look at how the single men answered in comparison to the married for twenty-five years or over men! I would share them with you on here, but some of the guys wanted to be kept anonymous, so I will do as they wish.

The TAKS testing season has come and gone, and with that, I feel like I can breathe again! We still have the Math retake test, but the bulk of it all is over with - especially all the reading! Yeah! Another big event in my 'school life' is that I found out Friday, that I am officially moving up to the Junior High! Shocking, I know! With no Kindergarten Jobs open in the district at this time, I resorted to finding another way to instill "change" in my life, and volunteered to move up to sixth grade, which will now be housed on the junior high campus. Never did I think I would become a junior high teacher, but as I always say, God has a sense of humor! We met with our new principal today, and I really am excited about the move - just disturbed by all the ranting and raving from some of the other teachers moving over as well. Everyone seems a bit stressed, asking question after question which obviously can't be answered right now! I just sat there in silence at the meeting - I was overwhelmed with all the questions! I'm just going to be happy about the move, make the most of it, not stress, and teach what my new principal thinks I'll be best at. I did put a word in for teaching Social Studies - world history, which I think would be a ton of fun, but I'm going to have to wait and see. He told us we should know by Friday what our content will be.

So on to this weekend. I came back from Austin just in time to help coach the Xtreme team with Challenger Baseball! The kids did a great job! Saturday was spent cleaning up the yard, killing thousands of mosquitoes with great insect killer, and then resting. I woke up early and went to church as usual, as well as lunch with some friends, which has become a weekly outing. Something was said at lunch though, that has really got me thinking. I'm a bit perplexed actually, and the thoughts just won't get out of my head. In recent weeks I've been asked a few times when I'm moving next. That question has never really bothered me-I know I don't have the best record of staying in one place, and my three year mark will be coming up in September, but for some reason, it just didn't sit well. I was a bit hurt this past Sunday when the friends that I was with kept talking about it. They were making bets on when I would be gone next, and when I do leave, who wants to buy my house, or who wants to rent the rooms out. It's like they're just waiting for me to leave! I know that's not really the truth and I know they were just doing it in fun, but gosh, it really made me think. I struggle with it, I really do, but I truly feel content here. Unfortunately after lunch though, my mind was racing. Am I supposed to be here? Is having them ask me a way God is saying time to move on? Do I really have to leave - is it just expected of me? What if I don't want to? Will people be disappointed if I stay? I just want someone to say "Addie, I want you to stay, please don't leave," but I know that's not going to be happening anytime soon! So what am I supposed to think now - my heart is torn. I really have been content in being here - I want to change my pattern of moving all the time, but yet in the back of my mind I'm thinking about all the opportunities that could lie ahead. I want a reason to stay - Just pray for me please - I'm at a loss.

I guess I'll have to end it here for now. So much to think about and end upon. My eyes are gradually closing between sentences, so I better logout and go to bed. Until next time, take care and God bless.